a little bit of this, a little bit of that

I hate how you ruin my day, everyday.

why am i so freaking pathetic

i’m crazy

i’m scared

so scared

i care too much now. why have i let myself get this far? i should’ve stopped caring.

please, please, please. i pray for something to get me out of this. something, someone. please. i don’t want to care this much.

i’m just going to get hurt in the end.

and i’ve already hurt so much.

i don’t think i’m ready for a relationship.

not like this. not a relationship like this.

maybe i’m ready for a relationship where i actually see him almost every day, but no. not like this.

i hate this. i want a relationship so badly but it’s hurting me so much.

i cry everyday.

and i’m tired of crying.

lol here come the tears again

why am i so pathetic

i really need girls to talk to about my girls problems, now that i think about it. all of the posts on this tumblr are depressing, only because i feel like it’s the only place i can vent and talk about it. where i can write my feelings and MAYBE someone will see, instead of just keeping a private word doc on my computer or something. not like i’m expecting anyone to see, it’s just that … i don’t know. i guess there’s just something to posting something public.

that goodbye hurt so much.

time to put on my fake happy persona again. the happy persona people saw yesterday was real. it was nice to put it on again after such a long time.

probably gonna cry myself to sleep. what the fuck else is new

actually, why do i keep on complaining how my life is. there are tons worse out there.

and plus, i am a gigantic bitch. that’s why karma hits me with all this shit.

i’m so tired of these tears. i really, really am. i don’t wanna keep crying. but i don’t want to let this go either. i want this to last so badly. i want to see an actual us.

it’s not fair. it’s just not fair.